Raising Color Blind Kids And Why I Wouldn’t Dare

In college I took a year-long Multicultural Mediation course that met on Saturdays and required an overnight camping trip in order to earn a passing grade. Going to school every Saturday is a testament to any college student’s dedication, but I would do it again in a heartbeat.

Among the most life altering realizations I gained from that class was that I would never subscribe to the racial ideology of color blindness. The idea of being “color blind” is based on the premise that all people should be judged equally, regardless of color of skin. Not such a bad idea, theoretically. Akin to MLK’s message to judge people on the content of their character rather than the color of their skin, I don’t think he ever meant to make a person’s skin color obsolete.

Should we raise color blind kids?

To be blind is to physically not see. To be color blind is to see the world void of color, or lesser hues of them. So if you have healthy eyesight yet still refuse to see the color in these beautiful little girls, it would be difficult for me to believe you. I’d maybe even call you a bit ignorant. Seems harsh? Perhaps. But I’d rather be ignorant than racist, like this article, Colorblind Ideology is a Form of Racism by Monica Williams, Ph.D., would label one as.

To a certain extent, I agree with the above article. Actually, I completely agree. The idea of ending discrimination by removing the discourse on skin color hinders our end goal by creating a shield of ethical superiority. And, I don’t believe it. I just can’t believe that anyone is walking this earth without viewing and assessing and generalizing the world around them. I certainly don’t believe that because you refuse to acknowledge skin color, you are ethically void of discrimination. It’s when language, thought and action turns hateful, ignorant and with nasty airs of superiority that generalizations turn into discrimination and racism. Or even worse, like the aftermath we are watching unfold in the trial of a crazy man who killed an unarmed kid because he was walking down the wrong street with a hoodie over his head {because, Trayvon wasn’t murdered because he was black, right?} the practical implementation of color blindness is an utter farce. For those of us who can’t choose when skin color is relevant to the discourse of our lives, color blindness is worse than a joke — its dangerous.

As it pertains to raising color blind kids, I wouldn’t dare consider this approach as a viable lesson plan. And especially as a parent to children of mixed backgrounds, I would never subject them to an ideology that strips them of their skin color, their culture, their heritage. Why would anyone want to remove the beauty of this world’s differences from the conversation, anyway? Color blindness does not allow us to embrace the differences among us; nor then grant us the opportunity to learn how much of the same we really are. If you are looking to raise globally astute citizens of the world, taking the color blind approach is not for you.

Personally, I find so much beauty in the variance of skin colors, and the myriad of cultures associated with them. When I look at photos of my family, I am proud of the way we look. I think we’re beautiful. So, although it took me some time to become comfortable with her questions and how I would approach them, when my two and a half year old, inquisitive little girl asked me if Daddy is black, if Mommy is brown {and what that made her}, I was able to talk to her about the variances of our skin colors and highlight our  beauties {in an age appropriate manner}. If I subscribed to color blindness, what would I have told her? That we’re all the same, when she is obviously picking up our differences? Would I shun her questions in the name of “color blindness”, even though I know the world can be so damn ugly? No. My answer is no; if my child wants to talk about skin color, then I’m going to talk about skin color. I want Alina to be aware of the differences within her family, and love them. Be proud. And associate her brown skin with beauty, not something to be blind to. Heaven knows our society doesn’t always do the best job at that.

As opposed to approaching race and skin color from a color blind perspective, I encourage you to consider a more inclusive ideology. According to Monica Williams, Ph.D., from the article mentioned above, the better alternative is Multiculturalism:

“The alternative to colorblindness is multiculturalism, an ideology that acknowledges, highlights, and celebrates ethnoracial differences. It recognizes that each tradition has something valuable to offer. It is not afraid to see how others have suffered as a result of racial conflict or differences.”

I wholeheartedly agree. In a world that holds onto so much ignorance, opening the discourse on skin color, differences in traditions and being open to listening to another’s suffrage, is vital to the improvement of our world. And I HAVE to believe our world is improving; maybe even naively so. I owe it to my kids to see the beauty in our society and the people within it. Its such a thin line to walk. I don’t want Alina to grow up with constant fear that she will be discriminated against, but it goes without saying that the thought of Sebastian being physically harmed while walking down the street makes me fall into a near panic.

So, how do you incorporate multiculturalism into your daily life? Try to live with the idea and parent your children with multiculturalism as part of your value system. Talk to you kids about skin color, different cultures, or at the very least, don’t shy away from the topics if they ask you. Be curious and ask questions about cultures and traditions unfamiliar to your own, without worry of seeming “ignorant”. Better to ask from a place of sincere curiosity, than pretend like you know it all and actually look ignorant. And quite simply, engage with people that don’t look like you. Its really that simple. Make friends. Associate. Identify with. Realize that, with everything that makes us different, we are all very much the same.